On Mothering...

I just finished putting the kids to bed and Nathan (who has been sick and incredibly clingy) was having NONE of it! I put up the gate on his bedroom door and thought he'd give up and fall asleep. No such luck. He stood at the gate screaming and crying for me. It's been a little tiring (that's an understatement) that he loves me so much! I've been tired and a little cranky (pregnancy hormones) and it's been wearing on me to have a fussy clingy toddler constantly needing to be held. Needless to say, my house has been feeling the loss. Well, I decided to go up and just sit on the floor by his bed for awhile to see if he'd calm down enough to fall asleep. I sat down and he reached his chubby little toddler hand out to hold mine. Then he tilted his head up and looked at me right in the eyes and smiled really big, then let out a big sigh and closed his eyes and turned his head. Well that just melted my heart and I decided to stay for a little while longer. Not long after that Tyler rolled over and saw that I was sitting on the floor in his room. He grabbed his pillow and blanket and curled up on the floor next to me and fell asleep with his arms around me. Double melted heart! I sat there for awhile thinking about how much I love being a mother. I thought about the little baby that's growing inside of me and how much I'm going to love her (just a guess, we don't know it's a girl yet) and I thought about all of the chaos that's been going on lately. Sick and cranky kids, messy, messy house, piles of laundry that have taken over most of the kids bathroom and Christmas shopping to finish and a to do list that still needs some attention, and I looked at my sweet boys and thought about my two sleeping girls and my dear sweet husband who's down in the basement working like a madman to meet deadlines and take care of our family and I just felt so grateful. What a wonderful life Heavenly Father has blessed me with! What great kids we have and what a wonderful man I married! We took Nathan into the doctor the other day and saw a doctor that we've been to a few times but not for a long time (not our primary care doctor) and he smiled so big when I walked in with all four kids in tow, and said, "Hello there Ehat's! I remember you guys! You're all so well behaved every time you come in!" That made me feel so good because I always dread taking all four kids anywhere, especially to the Doctor's office where people are sick and not feeling well and not interested in loud rambunctious kids ringing in the ears!

Anyway, I just feel so grateful to be a mother right now! I'm grateful for my sweet husband who sustains me and helps me so so so much. I couldn't do anything that I do without him and his love and support! As I sat on the floor in my boys rooms tonight I remembered that I'd made some scrapbook pages awhile back that describe a lot of how I'm feeling and I thought I'd share them with you. Let me know if you have a hard time reading them when they're full size and I'll post the text.

This last one is my favorite quote (it's on the title of my blog too) it's by Edgar A. Guest and it's part of a poem titled "Home" and it says, "Here is the sum of all my story, here is my fortune and my glory." THAT is how I feel. My family, my calling as a mother is the sum of my story, it's what I glory in, it's what give me "fortune". I love being a mother!